Feeling lonely
Listening to "Miss You" - M-flo loves Melody & Ryohei Yamamoto
Currently addicted to listening to slow jams
Currently irritated by not being with michael
Randomness: DAMNIT!
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well there's nothing really to do...besides comback and type about my day...i have no michael till saturday...*tear*...oh well...i guess i can wait till then. well i guess i'll be going now to work...i'll be back...haha...
well i've been back since 3 something this afternoon...i miss michael a lot though...i haven't seen him since monday....it's been 3 days...it's so cold here and lonely...when michael is with me i feel warm inside and happy and not alone...just not being with him hurts my heart...but i guess i have to deal with it...there's people who see him more than me...well i won't see him till satudary but if not then i guess soon after that...hmm...this has been a lonely week...missing someone so much that you just want to cry...that's how i'm feeling right now...i miss him so much....i didn't get to talk to him otday...damn belda getting his phone confiscated...BAKA! well i guess tomorrow will be another day being lonely and cold. i miss michael so much...i'm weak...i'm not strong...this pain of not seeing him is hurting so much. but i guess i always have to try something new...i'll be strong for michael...it'll be hard...well, that's basically my day...i didn't really do much today...just worked and all...that's about it! well i'mma go now and weep in my room...bye bye!
...love is not worth the pain...
12.01.2005
11.30.2005
YAY! :)
Feeling relieved and happy
Listening to "A Song For XX... " - Ayumi Hamasaki
Currently addicted to waiting for michael's emails...
Currently irritated by nothing
Randomness: *cough*
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well from the last time i posted in this was, i think Monday?! well monday didn't go well...but michael came over and good timing too...i was crying...interesting?! well michael asked me what was wrong and of course i told him...then all we did was sit, eat, and enjoy watching TV....and also helping michael with his class project...thatw as fun!
well yesterday was mommy's birthday...eh...i didnn't go to work or anything like that...and michael called me up but i talked to waffle though...oh well...a few hours pass...and i thought it was a false alarm or something...WOO HOO! i have my period!!! i'm so happy!!! woo hoo! :) besides all that...i didn't get to make an appt...b/c mommy came home whn i was making the phone call....grr...oh well...
today...today....there's nothing to do today...besides work but i don't work till 1pm...so yeah...i told michael to drop by after school and before he drops off eughene at cuyamaca college....so yeah! so i really don't know how today will go though....but i'll be back if i have any good news or anything like that...haha...well i'mma go now...i'm so happy! :) even though i'm cramping right now!...grr...oh well! :)
Listening to "A Song For XX... " - Ayumi Hamasaki
Currently addicted to waiting for michael's emails...
Currently irritated by nothing
Randomness: *cough*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
well from the last time i posted in this was, i think Monday?! well monday didn't go well...but michael came over and good timing too...i was crying...interesting?! well michael asked me what was wrong and of course i told him...then all we did was sit, eat, and enjoy watching TV....and also helping michael with his class project...thatw as fun!
well yesterday was mommy's birthday...eh...i didnn't go to work or anything like that...and michael called me up but i talked to waffle though...oh well...a few hours pass...and i thought it was a false alarm or something...WOO HOO! i have my period!!! i'm so happy!!! woo hoo! :) besides all that...i didn't get to make an appt...b/c mommy came home whn i was making the phone call....grr...oh well...
today...today....there's nothing to do today...besides work but i don't work till 1pm...so yeah...i told michael to drop by after school and before he drops off eughene at cuyamaca college....so yeah! so i really don't know how today will go though....but i'll be back if i have any good news or anything like that...haha...well i'mma go now...i'm so happy! :) even though i'm cramping right now!...grr...oh well! :)
11.28.2005
out of all things
Feeling worried and stressed out
Listening to "Angel's Song" - Ayumi Hamasaki
Currently addicted to worrying
Currently irritated by my stupidness
Randomness: AHHH!
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What i mean by "out of all things" is that i did something that i shouldn't have done but i can't change it now...well i don't know what people are thinking "if" they ever read this. i have lost my virginity....i know, huh....stupid me...but i'm happy that i lost it to the person i love with all of my heart...michael roy...we're trying hard to prevent myself from pregnancy...so yeah...no we didn't use protection...so we're planning on getting birth control pills...i hope it helps and get a pregnancy test thingy...i want this to blow over soon...i hope i'm not pregnant...but if i am then i guess i have to use the birth control pills...*sighs*...yes that night we became fools....but fools in love...haha...well i'm praying that GOD is watcing over us and helping us get through this...and i'm not ready to tell my parents about this yet...i need some time to get things through my head before i do anything reckless. i don't regret anything that we've done...i just hope that we face them together and he doesn't leave me...he's my first...and i want to stay it that way...and i want him to be last too...hmm...well i guess i'll go now...please god watch over us and banish the devil while me and michael are trying our best to make things right again...PLEASE I PRAY IN YOUR NAME! i love you god! please...AMEN! take care you all! :)
Listening to "Angel's Song" - Ayumi Hamasaki
Currently addicted to worrying
Currently irritated by my stupidness
Randomness: AHHH!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What i mean by "out of all things" is that i did something that i shouldn't have done but i can't change it now...well i don't know what people are thinking "if" they ever read this. i have lost my virginity....i know, huh....stupid me...but i'm happy that i lost it to the person i love with all of my heart...michael roy...we're trying hard to prevent myself from pregnancy...so yeah...no we didn't use protection...so we're planning on getting birth control pills...i hope it helps and get a pregnancy test thingy...i want this to blow over soon...i hope i'm not pregnant...but if i am then i guess i have to use the birth control pills...*sighs*...yes that night we became fools....but fools in love...haha...well i'm praying that GOD is watcing over us and helping us get through this...and i'm not ready to tell my parents about this yet...i need some time to get things through my head before i do anything reckless. i don't regret anything that we've done...i just hope that we face them together and he doesn't leave me...he's my first...and i want to stay it that way...and i want him to be last too...hmm...well i guess i'll go now...please god watch over us and banish the devil while me and michael are trying our best to make things right again...PLEASE I PRAY IN YOUR NAME! i love you god! please...AMEN! take care you all! :)
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